Category: Reviews
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Doomed Chemistry
Ever have a crush on someone from afar? Someone you only know a little bit, but they seem like your “type”? Well, I did. It’s 10 pm and I’m driving to Murray’s house. Porch lights flick on as I drive down his street. I pull to the curb. It’s still open-window weather, and I overhear…
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It Started With A Syringe
I was at work the other day and ended up having a conversation about losing your virginity. Believe it or not, I wasn’t the one who brought it up. “I was thirteen,” my co-worker, Ginnifer with the Blue Mani, said. “I was fifteen,” said Shelby with the Mauve Lip Liner. “And I’ve been on birth…
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Waking up on Wednesday
It’s a schitzo kind of morning in a hotel room on the outskirts of town. Despite how thick the blinds are, the sun manages to shoot across the unmade bed. Beside me lies a snoozing male companion. Um, what’s his name? No, seriously…what was his name? I jump out of bed and tiptoe across the…
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Memories of Last Weekend
I’m a nymphomaniac courtesan at Motel 6 on Niagara Falls Boulevard making predictions about love. There’s no better place to write about romance than a seedy motel. It’s where you can spark up some pcp, listen to the night’s heavy breathing, dip into the ink and sink into your thoughts. My adventures in the name…
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WTF R U TALKING ABOUT: VOL. 1
Thank you to all the men who send me messages on Facebook. Please don’t stop! Whether it’s to discuss their relationships, sex lives, or secretive forays into bisexuality, I had no idea my blog would resonate so well with men. I’m blessed to learn what I have about the male mind, which is… that…
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Working the Corner in Niagara Falls
It’s 11:40 a.m. and four old men are collected, like a clump of fungus, in the parking lot of the corner 7-11. They hold 40 oz. Ballentine’s Ales in dirty, gloved grips and discuss an impending “disability check.” When I walk by, coughs and groans bubble from their raspy throats. It’s been a long time…
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Valentine’s Day: What’s Love Got to Do With It?
February is said to be the most romantic month of the year. It’s a time to bask in a sea of sexuality without shame. We spend weeks, sometimes months out of the year, shooting Cupid’s arrows at the objects of our affection. Valentine’s Day should be for reaping the benefits of these efforts. But this…
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Splitting the Bill in a Post-Feminist World
First dates are like fire drills – sometimes they are real, but most of the time they are false alarms, but we are still lucky to get out of them alive. I’m moving up from not introducing my boyfriends to my parents to completely not telling anyone I’m going on a date at all. I…
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All Dogs Go to Heaven, All Cats Go to Hell
Monogamy bores me. I prefer to keep it casual. My “official relationships” last anywhere from three to five months. After that, I can’t take it anymore. I resort to the quick n’ easy break up – via phone, text, or just out of nowhere one day. This doesn’t make me a bad person –…
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